Pushing boundaries without losing yourself How professionals balance study, work and life
Pursuing a post-academic programme alongside a job and a family sounds ambitious and it is. A growing number of professionals choose to return to education. They want to deepen their knowledge, reorient themselves or simply continue to develop. Yet anyone who goes back to the classroom while work continues inevitably faces a challenge. How do you maintain a balance between learning, working and living?
Author: Anouk van de Vrie
This requires planning and discipline but also something more subtle. You need to know where your boundaries lie and when to push them. Without stretch there is no growth and without boundaries there is no rest.
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When should we protect boundaries, and when should we stretch them?
Lonneke Korenromp coaches students in the MBA programmes at the VU School of Business and Economics. She guides professionals who want to grow alongside their career and sees every day how essential it is to shift between effort and recovery.
'When should you protect your boundaries and when should you allow them to move a little, because that is where learning happens,' she explains. 'Anyone who starts studying again is by definition in transition. It is exciting because it opens new doors but it can also feel uncomfortable because change always brings uncertainty. It helps to know that. It allows you to be kinder to yourself.'
In her coaching process Korenromp helps participants to identify their non-negotiables, the things they are not willing to sacrifice in the busy rhythm of work and study.
'These can be very small things,' she says. 'For example choosing not to open your email in the evening if you cannot act on it anyway. You cannot pick it up anymore but it stays in your mind. By intentionally creating some distance you create space for rest. Small choices can make a big difference.'
Wanting everything at once
This is a familiar pattern for Sanne Meeder, student coach in the part-time Accountancy programme.
'Our students are often young professionals between roughly 21 and 40 years,' she explains. 'They are juggling three major parts of their lives, their job, their studies and their personal life. This demands finding a constant state of balance, a learning process they are right in the middle of. We often hear: I want my diploma as soon as possible. We then explore where that pressure comes from, whether it is internal, work related or simply the result of enthusiasm.'
Meeder is the first point of contact for questions or concerns.
'We try to keep things as approachable as possible,' she says. 'Students know they can turn to us when something is getting in the way of their progress. It helps when someone listens without judgement and thinks along so the student can move forward again. That personal contact and the right questions provide direction and confidence.'
'The need to set boundaries is not an issue of luxury.'
The numbers behind balance
The need to set boundaries is not an issue of luxury. The Dutch National Survey of Working Conditions of 2023 shows that forty four percent of employees struggle to maintain work life balance. The percentage of workers with burnout complaints rose in 2023 to 19 percent, the highest level ever recorded.
Students also face pressure. The National Student Monitor 2023 reports that one in three part-time students regularly experiences stress caused by combining work and study. The Trimbos Institute Monitor of Student Mental Health from 2023 shows that 44 percent of students experience symptoms of anxiety or tension.
A quote from a student who received coaching from Sanne Meeder:
'During my studies I realised how valuable it was to be able to discuss things regularly with my coach Sanne. It was not only about the academic content but also about looking together at what was realistic in terms of planning so I could make progress. With a full-time job, young children and the pressure to perform well in every area, I sometimes felt as if I was running past myself.'
'Boundaries are not walls. They provide direction. And they may shift, as long as you stay in control.'
Setting boundaries with intention
Both Korenromp and Meeder emphasise that setting boundaries is not about doing less but about making more conscious choices.
“I actually do not give advice,” Korenromp says. “We explore together what matters and what choices fit that. When people check in with themselves more often they naturally sense where the boundary is.”
Their approach reflects the SER report Grip op Werk from 2022 which identifies boundary setting as a key skill for sustainable careers. Workers who make clear agreements about working hours and recovery moments report 40 percent fewer stress complaints than those who do not.
“It is about awareness,” Meeder adds. “After one or sometimes several conversations students begin to see that you cannot do everything perfectly in your job, your studies and your personal life. Sometimes good really is good enough and they already start to feel better. Sometimes the recognition alone helps. Yes it is a lot and yes it is allowed to feel difficult sometimes. That personal insight gives clarity about what healthy boundaries look like.”
Boundaries offer direction
Boundaries are rarely fixed or final. They shift with life stage, ambitions and circumstances. The point is not to say no as often as possible but to know where no is necessary and where there is room to grow.
'Boundaries are not walls,' says Korenromp. 'They provide direction. And they may shift, as long as you stay in control.'
According to the National Monitor of Work Happiness 2024, employees who regularly discuss their boundaries with managers or colleagues score 33 percent higher on work happiness than those who do not. Boundaries are therefore both personal and relational. They become visible in contact with others.
A quote from an MBA student who received coaching from Lonneke Korenromp:
'Coaching during my programme felt like a gift. There were moments when I felt a lot of uncertainty but could not identify its source. Through my sessions with Lonneke I gained clarity about where it came from and how I could address it.'
The messy middle
Anyone who studies alongside their work eventually encounters the messy middle, the phase in which everything seems to happen at once and balance is hard to find.
'Change is always a little messy,' says Korenromp. 'But that is exactly where growth happens. Knowing that helps, because it prevents you from thinking something is going wrong. It is part of the process.'
'Life is meant to help you get to know yourself better,' Meeder concludes. 'Sometimes you need to step slightly over your boundary to discover where it lies, as long as you learn from it.'
Pushing and protecting boundaries is therefore not a contradiction but a continuous dance. Those who learn to navigate between ambition and kindness, and between effort and recovery, gain more than a diploma.
Boundaries make growth possible, and growth teaches us where our boundaries are.
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